Have you ever had that motivation to get healthy? It’s like you wake up one morning, buzzing at the good sleep you’ve just had and the fact that the sun is shining outside. It makes you want to reach for the fruit bowl and ingest a little sunshine.
That then spreads right down to your toes, giving you the push that you need to lace up those sneakers and head out the door for a run. Healthy living isn’t just about the food you eat and the runs you take, though, it’s about how you feel on the inside. Only those who feel motivated enough to be healthy will take it by the horns and push forward with a plan to live their life being full of energy and excitement.
When you feel like that, you want the whole world to feel as good as you do. So, when you look over at your partner sitting slumped on the sofa with a bag of chips and a creamy dip, it can really give you a cause for concern.
It’s a common thing that happens with couples who are in love. When you want to take care of your body and look after your heart, you want your partner to do the same and live a long and happy life of health with you. You want them to feel good about themselves. You want them to pick up their sneakers and come for a run, because happy couples will run together and get involved with each other and support each other.
The thing is, you cannot change someone else to suit your own happiness. You may want them to be healthier and happier with you, but they could feel perfectly healthy and happy. There’s no need to nag or push someone else into the lifestyle that you are living. It doesn’t mean that you don’t love them, it just means that they may not be as ready as you to make that change. Habits take time to form, they don’t happen overnight. It makes a lot of sense to bide your time and WAIT for them. Wait for them to find your successes and energy infectious.
You can easily rope your partner into being healthier with you without telling them. If you’re the person in the house that cooks the meals, you get to be the one in charge of the menu for the week and the grocery shopping that it takes to put that menu together. They will eat healthier foods because there isn’t an alternative for them. You can also encourage them to browse Medicare plans together, ensuring that even if they don’t want to stop with the chips and dip, they’re at least covered if they need medical help in any capacity.
The thing to remember is that people will always do what suits them. If your partner doesn’t want to get up and start working out, they won’t do it. Until they are ready. It’s important that you don’t get yourself bogged down in the concern that you have. Concern is lovely; it means that you worry about their health and the way that they live. It’s a beautiful thing. But nagging and pushing and bullying someone into a lifestyle that they may not want could have an opposite effect. You could push them away from you, instead of toward the healthier life that you are living. It’s just not the way to do things.
With all that in mind, I’ve got four things for you to start working on; before you end up in the guest bedroom in frustration at their lack of motivation compared to yours!
Remember How You Started
When you first decided to put down the doughnuts and pick up the apples, how did you do it? How long did it take you? How many months of talking yourself into eating better and working out did it take? You see, you may just remember how hard you fought against yourself. It’s always easy to be stressed out and eating the junk food after work and it’s always a hardship to head to the gym, right? Well, before you nag your partner, remember how long you took to get yourself up and out – then be supportive of their own direction.
Your Happiness Does Not Depend On Their Lifestyle
Okay, so we’re not talking huge things like drugs or crime, but the happiness of the person you are with is up to them. If you are holding onto your concern, making it your business to force them into your lifestyle, you’ve lost control. If your happiness is going to depend on whether they can make that choice, you’ve lost your power. We don’t want to see the people that we love stuck in the mud, but you still have to work on you and make sure that you feel whole. Keep pushing forward and just cheer them on when they have their beginnings.
Notice The Good Bits
So, your partner loves to sit and snack in the evening. Is this really so bad? Are they participating in the family and pulling their weight around the house? Are they working a job alongside that, as well? Then let it go. Their evening and their downtime is up to them. Yes, encourage healthier snacks like these, but don’t force it. Take notice of the good things and you can learn to pick your battles.
When you nag your partner about their weight or physique, are you really concerned about their shape or are you projecting your insecurities about yourself? We often judge our partners when we are feeling insecure and not worthy. Make sure that you accept yourself before you start telling your partner that they should accept themselves.
Your whole life is the two of you together, kicking butt at hitting your couple goals. You can still be couple goals on different health paths. Don’t push it; just love each other.