5 Tips for Dating After Divorce

Dating can be a challenge at any age, but getting back on the market after a divorce is even more difficult. Even your divorce was amicable, you’re probably nursing some bruised feelings and will be out of practice at the world of dating. When you feel ready, dating can help you to feel normal and like yourself again.

Make Sure You’re Ready

Divorce can be very emotionally draining, so it is probably best to wait until your divorce is final before you start dating. You’ll be more likely to meet someone you genuinely like and have a better chance of building a healthy relationship than you would if you met someone while still licking your wounds from divorce settlements. 

Only start dating when you want to. Don’t let well-intentioned loved ones pressure you into ‘getting back out there’ if you don’t feel ready. Date because you’d like to meet new people and enjoy yourself, not to get back at an ex or make yourself feel wanted again. 

Approach Dating The Right Way

Just because your marriage ended doesn’t mean you have anything to prove. You might meet the one through dating, or you might not. Both are fine. You don’t need to approach every date like a search for a new spouse. Instead, try to relax and enjoy yourself. Dating should be fun, and a good way to spend time with new and interesting people. 

Try not to compare the people you date your ex. It won’t help you to move on. Always be honest too; divorce is an emotionally distressing thing and it’s sure to change the way you approach a relationship. Never lie about having been married before. Be honest from the start to get things started on the right foot. 

Take things slow at first. Dating might be tough for you at first, so don’t push yourself to rush into a relationship. When you meet someone you’d like to get more serious with, take things steady and be honest with them about any emotional difficulties you may be having in trying to get closer to them. Communication is key. 

Try Different Ways Of Meeting People

There are a huge number of ways to meet people now. Whether you ask a friend to set you up on a blind date, go speed dating, sign up for online dating or try something unusual like a chatline from https://callfreechatlines.com/, whichever way works for you is fine. There’s no right way to meet someone. Try a few and see what you enjoy. 

Treat dating as a way to try something new. Go on dates with people you wouldn’t have dated before your marriage. You never know who might end up impressing you. Try out different kinds of dates from the classic dinner and a movie, to something active like laser tag. 

Take Care Of Yourself

Be prepared for some emotions to surface at strange times. Take care of yourself, and remember you don’t have to keep dating just because you’ve started if you find you’re not ready after all. 

While you should be flexible about dating different kinds of people, you should also know what your deal breakers are. For example, if you have children, a dealbreaker might be someone who doesn’t like kids. Think about what’s important to you. 

Don’t feel rushed into introducing someone you’re seeing to your family. Your family will naturally be curious and probably excited if they think you’ve met someone who suits you. Even if they’re asking you to meet your new partner, wait until you’re ready. Meeting the family can make things very real and you may not be ready for that for a little while. This is even more true for your children; be sure it’s the right time. 

Be Honest With Children

If you have children, find an age-appropriate way to explain to them what’s happening. Let them know that you’re dating, and encourage them to discuss with you how this makes them feel. Be prepared for them to be confused, sad or angry; they may feel as though you’re replacing their other parent with someone new. Honest discussion will help them understand what is actually happening.

You and they should be honest about how your dating makes them feel. If you choose to introduce them to a new partner, keep talking and take on board any concerns they may have. Make sure they feel listened to and as though you’re taking them seriously. 

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About Author

Brittany Crane

Brittany is a blogger who loves to do stories on people who make a difference in the world. She graduated from Northwestern University in 2010 in Sociology and currently works part time as a Social Worker.

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